Slower, Wealthier, Happier

I had to learn that I deserve nice things.

And listen, that might sound simple. It might sound like the kind of thing you hear on a podcast or scroll past on Instagram—“You deserve it, Sis!” But for me, it was more than just a cute affirmation. It was a declaration. A reclamation. Because I didn’t always believe it.

I grew up watching people work hard. I’m talking real hard. My mother, my aunts, the women around me—they made things happen. They stretched dollars. They sacrificed. They made sure everybody else had what they needed, even if it meant they went without. And it was seen as noble. It was worn as a badge of honor.

I carried that into my own life.
I stretched.
I sacrificed.
I poured out.
And when I finally did get something nice for myself? I felt guilty.

I remember the first time I bought myself something purely because I wanted it. Not because I needed it. Not because it was on sale or someone else told me I should have it. But because I wanted it.

It was a bottle of perfume. Not just any bottle—a beautiful, elegant one that I had seen on a trip out of town. I had passed by it a few times, picking it up, smelling it, putting it back down. But something in me wouldn’t let it go. I kept thinking about it. I kept wanting it.

And one day, I just…bought it. I didn’t wait for permission. I didn’t try to justify it. I just walked into that store, picked it up off the shelf, went to the register, and swiped my card.

I felt my heart race a little bit.
I felt that knot of guilt rise up in my stomach.
And I ignored it.

When I got home, I unwrapped it slowly. I took my time with it. I placed it on my dresser like it was a prized possession. And every time I walked by, I smiled.

It was mine.
Because I deserved it.

---

I Deserve Nice Things (And So Does My Bank Account)

I used to think that wanting nice things was somehow selfish. Like I needed to prove that I could make do with less before I could ever ask for more. But that’s not true. That’s not even close to true.

The truth is, I deserve nice things. I deserve beautiful things. And so does my bank account.

There’s this idea that you have to choose—either you’re responsible with your money, or you get to enjoy it. But I refuse to believe that. I’m not choosing between wealth and joy. I’m claiming both.

I’m building a life where my bank account is full and my life is beautiful.
Where I can buy the candle just because it smells good.
Where I can pick up fresh flowers at the market and place them in every room.
Where I can invest in the things that make my life softer, richer, more me.

---

The Lie of Either/Or

We’ve been told for so long that you either have wealth or you have luxury—but not both.
You can either be responsible or be extravagant—but not both.
You can either save or spend—but not both.

But I’m calling that out for the lie that it is.
Because I do both.
I save. I invest. I build wealth.
And I buy the things I want.

The wooden bowls at Aldi that make me feel like I’m preparing a feast in the South of France.
The plush blanket that turns my living room into a sanctuary.
The bottle of perfume that makes me feel like I’m walking through the streets of Paris.

I deserve nice things.
Not because I’ve worked hard. Not because I’ve struggled.
But because I’m worthy.

---

So Does My Bank Account

For so long, I didn’t realize that my bank account deserved to feel good too. I used to treat it like a war zone—money would come in, and I’d watch it go right back out. I used to hold my breath when I opened my banking app, bracing myself for what I might find.

But I don’t live like that anymore.
I decided that my bank account deserved softness too.
I wanted to look at it and feel peace, not panic.
I wanted to scroll through my transactions and feel joy, not judgment.

So I stopped rushing. I stopped chasing. I stopped believing that my value was tied to my struggle. I started building systems that made my money feel good. I started treating my finances with the same softness I was giving to my life.

And the wildest thing happened—my bank account started growing.
Not just in numbers, but in peace.
In joy.
In security.

I wasn’t running on fumes. I wasn’t constantly checking to make sure nothing had gone wrong. I had finally built a relationship with my money that felt like trust.

---

Claiming What I Deserve

I deserve nice things.
I deserve beautiful things.
And so does my bank account.

It took me years to unlearn the belief that wanting more was selfish. It took me years to stop feeling guilty when I splurged on something just because it made my heart smile. But I’m here now. And I’m not turning back.

I’m building wealth and I’m living well.
I’m saving and I’m splurging.
I’m investing and I’m indulging.

Because I’ve done the work.
Because I’m worthy.
Because I deserve it.

---

Let’s Talk About It

I want to know—what’s one beautiful thing you’ve bought for yourself lately? Something that wasn’t on sale, something that wasn’t planned, something that you bought just because you wanted it. Drop it in the comments.

Because Sis, you deserve nice things. And so does your bank account.

Continue this conversation with women just like you in Wealthy Women Conversations on Facebook. Join us, share your story, and discover how slowing down can create space for more.