I was 26 years old, counting down the weeks to my 27th birthday, when I learned one of the most surprising truths about money:
It’s only a tool.
An important tool? Absolutely.
A tool I still desire more of? Without question.
A tool I respect deeply? You better believe it.
But at that time in my life, I had been carrying around this unshakable belief that if I just worked harder and made more money, all of my life’s problems would melt away. My stress would vanish. My joy would be full. My relationships would be peaceful. I’d feel confident, secure, and free.
That was the dream. And I was sure it would happen… once my bank account hit the “right” number.
The Day My Bank Account Hit “The Number”
I remember it so clearly.
I was living in Los Angeles. I had purchased my first home. I’d just gotten back from a beautiful international trip — I can’t remember now if it was Spain or France, but I remember the glow of it. And there I was, sitting in my living room, looking at my bank account and seeing that magic number I’d been chasing.
And do you know what I felt?
Empty.
Not relieved. Not overflowing with joy. Not even “light” from the supposed financial freedom. Just… flat.
I remember looking around my home thinking, This is it?
It wasn’t that the money wasn’t real — it was. But what I had built up in my mind, the emotional promise I thought it would deliver, simply wasn’t there.
The First Time I Noticed the Link Between Mind and Money
Now, I wish I could tell you that this moment sent me into deep personal work — that I booked therapy, read every book I could find on money mindset, started meditating, and made a vision board for my inner healing.
But no.
I did the exact opposite.
I went shopping. I bought more “nice” things. I looked for my joy in new real estate opportunities. I booked more trips.
I was doing what I now call “emotional outsourcing” — looking for external purchases to solve internal emptiness.
What I didn’t realize then was that my money decisions were coming from an unhealed mind:
- A mind shaped by scarcity thinking
- A mind shaped by an “always working” identity
- A mind that didn’t know rest or joy without productivity
- A mind that believed financial stability was the same thing as personal wholeness
Why More Money Didn’t Solve the Problem
Here’s the truth: when your mind is in a state of stress, disconnection, or survival mode, more money doesn’t automatically mean better outcomes.
It just gives you more resources to make the same decisions you’ve always made.
If you overspend when you’re stressed, you’ll overspend more.
If you procrastinate on bills when you’re overwhelmed, you’ll procrastinate on bigger bills.
If you avoid looking at your accounts when you’re anxious, you’ll still avoid them — the numbers will just be larger.
And that was my reality at 27.
The “money” part of my life had leveled up, but the “mind” part was still operating on old programming.
The Untold Link Between Mind and Money
It took years — and I do mean years — to realize that financial stability and mental stability are deeply connected.
Here’s what I know now:
- Your mental health impacts the quality of your financial decisions.
- Your emotional state impacts how consistently you follow through on those decisions.
- Your capacity impacts whether you can actually sustain the financial stability you’ve worked so hard for.
The two — mind and money — are in constant conversation. If your mental health is struggling, that conversation becomes strained.
And here’s the part no one told me:
Even if you have the money, without a healthy mind, you may not have the ability to hold on to it, grow it, and let it serve you well.
Why This Matters in the Real World
Think about your last big financial decision.
Did you make it when you were:
- Rested and clear-headed?
- Or exhausted, stressed, and running on fumes?
Most people underestimate how much that difference matters.
A well-rested, emotionally grounded person might look at an extra $5,000 and say, “Great, I’ll put this toward my debt and invest the rest.”
That same person, on two hours of sleep and a stressed mind, might blow through it in a week just trying to feel better.
This is why I say:
Your mind can be the real multiplier of your money… or the quiet leak that drains it.
Making More AND Being Whole
Let me be clear — I am not telling you to stop making more money. I’m not telling you that money doesn’t matter. In fact, I believe that having financial stability gives you the breathing room you need to address other areas of life.
But money is not enough on its own.
You have to build a healthy partnership between your financial strategy and your mental well-being. When they work together, your money can truly serve you, and you can sustain the wealth you’ve created.
When they don’t, you’ll constantly be chasing the next income bump, hoping this time will feel different — and it rarely does.
A Lesson That’s Stayed With Me
Now, at 50, I can look back and see that 27-year-old me was doing the best she could with the tools she had. And honestly, many of us are still doing that.
But I’ve learned something powerful:
If you want your financial life to feel abundant, secure, and peaceful — not just look good on paper — you have to tend to your mind as much as your money.
Because when your mind is clear, your decisions get better.
When your mind is rested, your creativity grows.
When your mind is whole, your wealth has room to breathe and expand.
Soft Challenge for This Week
Look at your last three major financial decisions.
Circle the ones made under stress or exhaustion.
Then ask yourself: If I had been rested and clear-headed, what might I have done differently?
If you’re ready to explore how your mind and money can work together to create real, lasting wealth, come join us in Wealthy Women Conversations — my private space for women who want both financial growth and a slower, happier, more intentional life.
#SlowerWealthierHappier #MindAndMoney #WealthyWomenConversations
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