Slower, Wealthier, Happier

I didn’t grow up hearing anything about my nervous system.

Not in school.
Not in church.
Not at home.

I didn’t know what it was, why it mattered, or that it even existed outside of medical textbooks. And I certainly didn’t know it had anything to do with money.

So when I signed up for a money block course a few years ago—hungry for answers, tired of the constant cycle of doing all the “right” things and still feeling stuck—I had no idea what I was walking into.

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My Body Was Saying “No,” Even When My Mind Was Saying “More, Please”

I remember sitting through one of the sessions and feeling…strange.

The teachers were using words like regulation, activation, parasympathetic, and dysregulation—and even though I speak English, it felt like they were speaking a whole different language.

Not because I couldn’t understand the words, but because my body was rejecting the message.

My chest got tight.
My shoulders tensed.
I felt overwhelmed and anxious.
And deep down, I felt like running. Like leaving the class. Like shutting it down.

Something inside of me didn’t want the information to land.

And that “something” was my nervous system.

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I Didn’t Know It Then, But I Was Trying to Heal With My Head While My Body Was Still in Survival Mode

See, I knew I wanted more money.
I knew I wanted to feel safe, secure, and supported.
I knew I was willing to give, to help others, to pour out generously.

But receiving? Holding on to the blessings I asked for?
That felt…off. Hard. Sticky.

I couldn’t figure out why until I asked the right question:

“What’s going on inside me that keeps pushing money, help, and support away?”

And that’s when I started to learn the truth that changed everything:

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✨ Your Nervous System Is Running the Show—Even When You Don’t Know It

Let me break it down as simply as I wish someone had told me:

Your nervous system is the part of your body that controls how you respond to stress, danger, peace, joy, safety, and uncertainty.
It’s like the emotional operating system for your life.

And it has one main job: Keep you safe.

That’s it.

Now here’s the catch…

Your nervous system doesn’t measure safety based on what you want.
It measures safety based on what you’ve gotten used to.

So if you’ve lived most of your life in:

• Stress
  
• Hustle
  
• Struggle
  
• Giving more than you receive
  
• Taking care of everyone else first
  

Then that becomes your baseline for “normal.”
Even if it’s exhausting. Even if it’s unsustainable.

So when something good tries to come in—like more money, more rest, or more help—your body might panic.
It feels different. It feels unsafe. It feels unfamiliar.

Your brain says “Yes!”
But your body says “This is too much. Shut it down.”

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The Disconnect Between Desiring More and Being Able to Hold It

Most of us think our money issues are about budgeting, jobs, or bad decisions.
But for so many of us—especially as Black women raised to be strong, responsible, and self-sacrificing—our money blocks are rooted in how our bodies learned to survive.

I wasn’t broke because I didn’t believe in abundance.
I was broke because my body only trusted struggle.

I wasn’t unavailable to wealth because I lacked vision.
I was unavailable because I hadn’t learned how to feel safe with ease.

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Signs You Might Have a Nervous System Money Block

Let’s make it plain. These are common signs that your nervous system might be pushing money away, even if your mouth is asking for more:

• You feel anxious when checking your bank account—even when there’s money in it
  
• You’re uncomfortable asking for help or raising your prices
  
• You overspend when you feel emotionally unsafe
  
• You self-sabotage right before financial breakthrough
  
• You undercharge, overdeliver, or take on too much
  
• You don’t trust that money will stay—so you never feel truly secure
  

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Let’s Get a Little Science-y (But Still Sister-Girl Friendly)

There are two main “sides” of your nervous system:

1. Sympathetic Nervous System = Fight or flight
   
   • This is your panic zone. Hustle. Pressure. Adrenaline.
     
   • It kicks in when you feel threatened (even by good change).
     
2. Parasympathetic Nervous System = Rest, receive, digest
   
   • This is your peace zone. Safety. Flow. Ease.
     
   • This is the space where your body feels safe enough to receive.
     

Most of us live stuck in fight-or-flight.

And until we help our nervous system feel safe again, we will unconsciously push away the very things we say we want—because they feel too good to be true.

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Healing Starts With Safety, Not Strategy

Here’s what shifted everything for me:

I stopped trying to outthink my body.
And I started trying to work with it.

That meant:

• Breathwork (even just 3 slow breaths in the car)
  
• Putting my hand on my chest when I felt anxious
  
• Learning to say “yes” to small help (like letting someone carry my groceries)
  
• Creating calming money rituals (soft music, candles, a pretty notebook when I do my finances)
  
• Talking kindly to myself when I noticed fear
  
• Giving my body proof that it was safe to receive
  

It wasn’t about doing it perfectly.
It was about doing it consistently.

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Journal Prompt: Let Your Body Speak

Take a moment and journal these with full honesty:

1. What does my body do when I think about receiving more money, help, or support?
   
2. Where in my life do I still associate struggle with safety or value?
   
3. What would safety feel like in my body—if I allowed it?
   
4. What’s one thing I could do this week to help my body trust ease?
   

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Wealth Whisper Tip 💸

You don’t need to work harder—you need to feel safer.
Wealth doesn’t just land in your hands. It settles in your nervous system.

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Let’s Heal and Rise—Together

You are not meant to do this alone.

Join us inside the Wealthy Women Conversations Facebook group, where we’re unlearning survival and practicing receiving—one breath, one boundary, one bank deposit at a time.

✨ Come be in the room with us

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