Softness Is a Strategy—And no, it’s not laziness; it’s liberation

OMG.
Let me start there.

Because finding what softness looks like—for me, in my body, in my rhythm, in my world—has been one of the most confronting, revolutionary, nerve-wracking journeys I’ve ever been on.

Not because I don’t want softness.
Not because I don’t crave peace.
But because everything I was taught said I had to earn it by way of exhaustion.

I Was Raised in the Gospel of Hustle

I’m not here to speak for everyone else.
Let me speak for myself.

I was raised in a culture where hard work was the badge.
Where late nights were expected.
Where you didn’t stop when you were tired, you stopped when the work was done.
Where being constantly needed meant you were valuable.
Where “rest” felt like a luxury you had to justify.

And for a long time, I was fluent in that language.
Working hard was my default.
Juggling all the things was my normal.
Proving my worth through productivity was how I knew I was doing enough.

But even with all that…
I wasn’t actually living the life I desired.

The Life I Was Building Was Not Built to Sustain Me

I was checking the boxes.
I was making things happen.
But I was tired. Deeply.

And when I started asking myself,
“What would it mean to live slower?”
*“What would it mean to be happy—not just accomplished?”
“What would it look like to feel wealthy in my spirit first?”

That’s when everything started shaking.

I didn’t just walk away from hustle.
I had to grieve it.

Because hustle wasn’t just how I worked—it was how I was seen.
It was how people identified me.
It was what they expected.
It was who I knew myself to be.

Saying Yes to Softness Felt Like an Earthquake

The moment I said “no more” to burnout-as-a-lifestyle, everything shifted.
Not just in my calendar—but in my relationships, in my marriage, in my nervous system, in my identity.

Suddenly, I wasn’t available for certain kinds of conversations.
I wasn’t willing to rush.
I wasn’t showing up just to prove I could handle it all.

And people noticed.
Not all of them clapped.

Some questioned.
Some pulled away.
Some didn’t understand why I was “slowing down so much.”

But the loudest voice wasn’t even theirs—it was mine.

I Was Still Asking: “Am I Doing Enough?”

Even in my softness, the old voices whispered:

“You should be doing more.”
“You’re falling behind.”
“You’re being lazy.”
“You’re not proving anything.”

And I had to confront the deep belief that worth was tied to struggle.
I had to tell myself a new truth—over and over again:

This isn’t laziness.
This is liberation.

This is what it looks like to reclaim my time, my pace, my priorities.
This is what it looks like to live in the body I’m in, without forcing it into timelines and expectations that were never made for me.

I Haven’t Mastered It—But I’m Committed

Softness doesn’t mean I don’t get things done.
It means I don’t self-destruct in the process.

Softness doesn’t mean I don’t have ambition.
It means I measure success by how I feel, not just what I produce.

Softness means I listen to my body.
To my spirit.
To my real capacity.

There are days when I still want to sprint.
There are days when I fall back into old patterns.
But my new default is checking in with myself first.

And that, in itself, is radical.

Softness Is a Strategy for a Longer Life

I want to live long.
I want to live well.
I want to live happy.

That means less proving, more presence.
That means honoring my rhythms, not bulldozing them.
That means restructuring how I measure “enoughness.”

Softness is my survival plan.
Softness is how I build wealth without wrecking my health.
Softness is how I honor the life I’m building, not just the work I’m doing.

And yes, there are challenges.
But there’s also a joy I didn’t know was available when I was always sprinting.

Let’s Talk About It

Are you in your softness era? Trying to enter it? Resisting it? Afraid of it?
Tell the truth in the comments.

I’m still learning how to live here.
But I know I’m not alone.

And if you’ve been trained in hustle but long to move with grace…
If you’ve mastered performance but desire peace…

Come sit with me in this conversation.

Let’s redefine success.
Let’s make softness the new standard.

Slower, Wealthier, Happier